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Between Us Guys : The Truth About Pornography [video]

April 1, 2013 2 comments

Amazing blog post. Please check it out.

Combat with porn is probably (still) the biggest issue Christian men wrestle with that no one talks about. Serious discussions about sexuality are embarrassing and uncomfortable. Too many churches are silent. And many are not proactive regarding faith-based sex education.

Lessons like this one can break the ice and be used to introduce a more comprehensive curriculum that is desperately needed in many Christian homes and churches. We can’t afford to become even more irrelevant and unconvincing in today’s rapidly changing culture.

Ref: Between Us Guys (Part 3): The Truth About Pornography .

Source: Darrell Martin and SameSexAttractions.wordpress.com

2013: A new year, a new you.

January 8, 2013 1 comment

2013: A new year, a new you..

An small excerpt of what femalepornaddict blogged …

Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry. Because of these the wrath of God is coming. You used to walk in these ways, in the life you once lived. But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips. Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off your old self with its practices and put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator.” Colossians 3:5-10

…. to read more please click here.

Video: “A pastor’s Disclosure”

November 9, 2012 7 comments

Surfing for God

September 12, 2012 6 comments

Why Is A Book About Porn Addiction Called “Surfing for God”? 

Almost a century ago, G. K. Chesterton wrote that the man who knocks on the brothel door is knocking for God. If he were writing today, he might say that the man who surfs the web for porn is surfing for God. If nothing else, this truth means that sex is a signpost to God.

Maybe you’ve heard the saying that in a marriage the sexual relationship is a barometer for the relationship in general. When a husband and wife enjoy a healthy emotional, relational, and spiritual connection, most of the time good sex follows. In the same way, a man’s sexual appetite is a barometer for what’s going on inside his heart. A man’s sex drive consists of more than testosterone and the buildup of seminal fluid pressing for biological release, more than being visually stimulated and feeling aroused.

Sexual arousal is an accumulation of your experiences, deep needs, and unconscious beliefs. Your heart shares a deep connection to your body parts. The way you are sexually aroused reflects what’s happening deep in your soul. This is why the Apostle Paul wrote, “There’s more to sex than mere skin on skin. Sex is as much spiritual mystery as physical fact” (1 Cor 6:16 Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in body? For it is said, “The two will become one flesh.”).

Want to hear more about this idea? You can get a free download of Surfing for God: Discovering the Divine Desire Beneath Sexual Struggle. Just visit www.nelsonfree.com/surfingforgod.

Dairy of a recovering addict – Jesus my strength

August 13, 2012 Leave a comment

On the journey to recovery, we meet every Tuesday at Nairobi West from 6.30pm – 8.30pm for the sexual addicts accountability group.

Most people think that recovering from an addiction is just a snap of the finger away. Well, I hate to burst your bubble, but recovering from an addiction, as I have realized, is one of the hardest battles one has to go through. In fact, to make it worse, it is a battle within which can lead anyone in their right senses crazy.

My recovery journey has been a 3 year journey of ups and downs from Jan 2010. One thing that has helped me is that I can run to God in confession and repentance and he can forgive me. I was however taught that repentance is turning 180 degrees from sin, you have to do this after confessing your sin. I thank God for giving me a good accountability relationship with a group of men, where I can be vulnerable. These guys are tough and have held me up when weak. They hold me accountable to everything I set as an action. I pray that you get such a group, a real group of friends, fearless and principled.

So, be encouraged if you are reading this, God’s grace is sufficient for you. He has the final say on your life. Just surrender to Him and ask for anything from Him in prayer. Remember, sexual sin has not power over you at all. What will it take for you to fight? A lost relationship? Lost job? Brokeness? Broken marriage? Act now man!!!

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James 1:12 Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.  You have been given the strength to do all things through Christ. Boast in Christ alone, boast in the cross as your only strength. This is a daily fight, wake up each morning and wear the full armor of God in prayer. If this life has anything to gain at all, I would count it all lost if I can’t hear my savior my strength. This is my solemn prayer for myself as well as you.

Affected by a person living in sin, in addiction, in sexual sin

July 17, 2012 9 comments

Hey, you, yeah you, please comment at the end, I need feedback on this…

Some of the most common issues I have had to deal with in the past are rather extra-ordinary. I have heard these, not from the person struggling, but from the people who they go to. All together, I thank God for exposing to me the extent of hurt that sin, more specifically sexual sin causes to those around us. For example;Image

  • a wife/girlfriend of an man who confesses sexual sin,
  • a friend or a girlfriend of a guy/girl who turns up to be a homosexual,
  • a guy who finds out that the wife/girlfriend is a addicted to sex.
  • a parent who identified a child with a weird sexual habit e.g. touching another girls/boys parts or masturbating
  • a parent/guardian/teacher who catches a child practicing voyeurism (fetish of seeing people naked)
  • a spouse to a partner who is confess/ caught committing adultery/fornication

How can someone deal with such? In the bible the book of John 8:1-10, Jesus was presented with such an individual; pharisees who caught an adulterous woman in the act. They tried to trick him to confess that she deserves punishment according to the Mosaic law in the old testament. However, Jesus, our Lord and saviour who gave us grace, told them that if any of them has never sinned let him/her stone the lady.  To our shock, most of them left one by one with the oldest going first.

What a powerful way of demonstrating that in God’s eyes all of us are sinners. It doesn’t matter whether it is a lie, a sexual lustful thought or sexual sin (all are sins), God’s love and grace, as shown to the adulterous woman, is enough to forgive us. As human beings, we magnify some sins above others based on our carnal minds forgetting that God’s standard of holiness is apart from us and can only be attained through Jesus Christ’ righteousness at the cross. God’s hates the sin not the sinner, he loves you and wants you to repent (confess and turn away from sin).

1 John 1:9

If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness

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From my short experience in dealing with sexual sinners, I have learnt several things;

  1. Never condemn the person who sins. Separate the person from the sin and walk with that person to the realization of who he/she is in Christ.
  2. Come down to that individuals level and understand what lead to them acting the way they did. May be they were exposed to the behavior by someone else and didn’t know any better when it happened
  3. Learn what God standard is and leave the example, by what you watch, listen to, speak, read, stand for. Impart that same standard through the word to the person gently.
  4. Help the person come up with an action plan by themselves and help them get accountability. If you can walk with the person through it. Ownership of accountability is on both partners, not one.
  5. Pray for the person and yourself for wisdom.

I praise God that someone, Pastor Chris Gatihi, took time to walk with me and impart the word of God, God’s standard in my heart where I have hidden it to stay pure.

Psalms 119:9-11

How can a young person stay on the path of purity?
    By living according to your word.
10 I seek you with all my heart;
    do not let me stray from your commands.
11 I have hidden your word in my heart
    that I might not sin against you.

7 Reasons Why Masturbation is Bad

July 2, 2012 4 comments

This are the reasons taken from an article on Aspire. Here’s the full article here http://www.aspire.org.ng/2012/05/understanding-masturbation/

Now here are the reasons

  1. It is addictive
  2. It conditions your body for self-stimulation (inspired by lust which is selfish)
  3. It causes sexual imbalance
  4. It causes you to be mastered by sin
  5. It makes you use your body as an instrument for sin
  6. It defiles God’s temple and grieves the Holy Spirit
  7. It reinforces carnal mindedness

When you get free from masturbation, you’re free to worship God better and with a pure heart.

PressThis: from http://howtostopmasturbation.wordpress.com/2012/06/20/7-reasons-why-masturbation-is-bad/

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